Who needs realism?

Over the last three years I have become more realistic as a person. Whether this was intentional I am yet to know, but it is an attribute that comes with growing up and one that unfortunately cannot be avoided.

Realism affects our ambitions, our hopes and dreams. That's why children are encouraged to fantasise, create stories and fuel their imagination in every way possible. Their innocence, determination and positivity is short lived. By adulthood it is replaced, by responsibility, cynicism and realism.

Often having a realistic outlook is beneficial. It is part of self-preservation, by enclosing ourselves in the idea of realism we expect to be disappointed, rejected and confused. That way we do not set our sights above our reach and can be pleasantly surprised on the rare occasions when our negativity is proved false.

However, realism can also cause extreme bitterness as it can vanquish the purity of undiluted ambition and prevent the desire to succeed. Many of us give up before we have begun, not because we don't believe we can do it, but because the stakes are too high and the statistics are against us. Therefore we provide the excuse that we are just being realistic.

I have uttered the previous sentence on many occasions in the last year, but when someone asked where my ambition had gone, I thought it was still intact just slightly matured. I was wrong it had been worn, eaten away by the need to grow up and think of the obtainable.

What is realism anyway? It is defined as 'a concern for fact or reality and rejection of the impractical and visionary' in the dictionary. So a dream is now considered impractical. Haven't they missed the point? The whole idea of dreaming is to reach for something more, something you cant see, something that you may never reach but at least you tried.

That is the point, to try. To endeavour to reach your own goals however unachievable they seem on a daily basis. However realistic we are, we cannot foresee the future. We do not know what reality may throw back at us. How do we know if reality as we know it even exists at all? We don't.

So next time you really really want something that's slightly out of reach, dont accept that it is too difficult and impractical. Just ask youself, 'Who needs realism?'

The Warm and Fuzzy feeling

I am of course referring to the rather nice but rare feeling found after snuggling up with a mug of hot chocolate; sitting by a fire in the winter, receiving a piece of good news, or a nice gift, or returning from a successful first date. (Or anything that involves romance!)

The feeling is usually followed by an involuntary need to grin like a Cheshire cat from ear to ear. This grinning cannot be prevented and can last from 5 minutes to 3 days depending on how intense the warm and fuzzy feeling is. In fact the smiling is so much that it usually prevents the recipient from talking. It can also be accompanied by high pitched screams of excitement and the recipient may also find that they are glowing with happiness.

After informing everyone that will listen of their reasons for this feeling, and enduring their friends giggles, taunts and proud smiles, the recipient is left content and a little warm but not as fuzzy. The feeling is so intense at first that once gone it is mourned and becomes addictive and then craved by the recipient if they do not experience it at regular intervals. For example, like an addiction one might have to Starbucks frappuccinos :) (no idea who would have that by the way!)

While awaiting their next fix of warm and fuzziness, the recipient may worry what may happen if their new found positivity is suddenly taken away. They are filled with the fear that after experiencing something so intense and fulfilling that they may be left empty again and the blow may be too hard to bear. I mean, after tasting real chocolate who really wants anything chocolate flavoured? The recipient may also wonder if they have been deceived or tricked and what they experienced wasn't a warm and fuzzy feeling at all. (You know Ashton Kutcher can pop out from behind a bush at anytime people!)

All these worries of course are controlled and produced by our need to be realistic and often controlled by a subconscious tendency to be cynical and expect the worst. This does not remedy well with the Warm and Fuzzy feeling, that exists to shine an element of the fantastical on everyday life. We all try not to dwell on fantasies nowadays as it often leads to disappointment. Therefore it is hard to believe that the Warm and Fuzzy feeling is A) happening at all and B) if we really deserve it.

I guess the greeting on the Warm and Fuzzy gift card should read:

"The Recipient must enjoy this comfortably and openly in every way possible. They must not disguise it any way, but embrace it and avoid any negative or cynical thoughts. If these rules are breached the Warm and Fuzzy fairy might revoke their card - Feelings may vary, Terms & Conditions apply"

Well, if we are going to live in fantasy world, we might as well make it legal!